I think it’s safe to say, we’re always looking for ways to make someone’s day. And often looking for ways not to rhyme so heavily…le sigh. But there’s something so special about warming the heart of your number one; being the best moment in her day. Here are a few ideas for the Nouveau Butch:
1. Get out of bed first. Don’t make a lot of noise, she doesn’t even need to know you’re up. But if you can get ready and get out of her way before she needs the bathroom, you’ll be a hero. Then you can get on to number two even sooner.
2. Make her breakfast and coffee–and clean it up. It’s all about making life easier for her. Anything you can do to save her a few moments, or solve problems for her will make her day.
3. Before she sets out on the world, compliment her. Whether you part ways in the driveway, on the corner, or at the Time Square subway station, let her know she looks great or that she smart or that she’s powerful or all of the above. You’ll send her skipping off to work.
4. Send her gifts/flowers etc at work. Unless of course, she’s not out at work. If she’s not out at work, this is the worst, I repeat, worst idea in the world. If she’s not out at work, help her find a job or place to work where she can be herself. But if she is, you’ll prove to her coworkers (and the world) that lesbians do it better.
5. Have refreshments ready when she comes home. If you can beat her home, great. If not just prepare a little cheese plate and pour a glass of wine right when you walk in the door. Then the two of you can sit down, open the mail, relax and discuss your plans for the evening. Instead of standing in the threshold, staring at your blackberry, muttering “What do you want to do about dinner?” you can discuss it in a civilized manner without the nag of hunger bringing out the beast in you both.
6. Always offer to cook, order, or take her out to dinner. Offer one of these. If she takes you up on it, great; if she doesn’t, then she’ll take care of it. Offering really is the most generous thing you can do without being pushy.
7. Offer to take her somewhere after dinner. Whether it’s for a romantic walk to help you digest, or a quick trip down to the ice cream shop, it makes the evening last longer thus adding to the happy, non-work part of your day.
8. Leave a note on her pillow. There’s no better way to climb into bed than with a surprise love-note on the night stand or under her pillow. It feels special, intimate, and will only lead to good things.
9. Engage in long hugs, passionate kisses, and don’t get too handsy. Unless, of course, she’s into that. Remind her how much you totally dig her.
10. Apologize. Even if you were totally right. It doesn’t matter. Love is always the answer. Being a jerk never solves anything. So say you’re sorry, forgive, and move on. Always.
*All of these suggestions are made in the spirit of a loving, reciprocal relationship. If you do these things for one who is not implicitly yours, you will seem desperate, stalker-ish, or terrifying. This is recommended for folks in a relationship over 2 years long. Also, don’t do them all in one day, she’ll think you cheated on her. And if you cheated on her, get off this blog, this is not the place for you–you dirty, dirty slut.