Editor In Butch

Archive for the ‘Edugaytion’ Category

Another Word For Happy…

In Edugaytion, Relationships, The Nouveau Butch on June 26, 2012 at 9:56 pm

This book, in our humble opinion, embodies the spirit of a certain kind of girl: the kind of girl who grows up to be the Nouveau Butch.  Thank you to the Author for telling this story.  It’s one many of us have lived, and we live it again through your pages.

This book will take you back to a time when love and anxiety felt very much the same.  Butterflies, red cheeks, new feelings, and sheer unbridled panic are the perfect cocktail for your first affair.  And you’ll get a healthy dose of all these things when you read Another Word For Happy… something we hope you’ll do soon!

Presently available for Kindle (or Kindle Ap) only — other versions to be released later this year — you can purchase yours here.

Happy reading Butches!

Love in the time of Poverty

In Edugaytion, Relationships, The Nouveau Butch on May 21, 2009 at 2:06 am

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Ok, so we’re all a little recession-struck at present.

Here are a few hot tips on how to keep your lover’s spirits up and share the love without dipping too deep into your pockets…and maybe, if you’re lucky, she’ll dip in just past your pockets later.

 

 

1. LICK IT. STICK IT.

carvable-post-card

Send your lover a note in the mail—better yet, make it a post-card.  Hand written notes are always romantic, always appreciated; and even if you live together, dropping a note in the mail-box at work and sending it home seems silly and sweet.  It’s a way to put a smile on your lady’s face for just over 50 cents.

 

 

 

2.  BEAT IT.

Dozen_Eggs_sidebar

A dozen eggs costs anywhere from $.99 to $6.99 (depending on the city you live in); that’s breakfast for two for a whole work-week!  Get up early and scramble some eggs. It’s easy, and it shows that you’re willing to put forth the effort to make up for the lack of cash you’re able to ‘shell’ out.

 

 

 

 

 

3. JUST DANCE.

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Put on some Gaga and get all googoo-eyed for your lady in the comfort of your own home.  A spontaneous dance-party in the living room could ‘lead’ to a dirty dance party in the bedroom.  It’s a fine line between the mambo and the horizontal mambo.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s important to remember to spoil your lady, even when you’re feeling broke.  Spoil her with compliments, spoil her with affection, spoil her with love.  Sure it’s fun to give a grandiose gift, do a fancy dinner, or take a trip together—but the building blocks of a strong relationship are made with love, not finances.  So be resourceful, even when your resources are low!

Tied Up

In Edugaytion, Tools of the Trade on February 3, 2009 at 2:19 pm

There’s no way around, over, or under it–every butch needs to know how to tie a tie.  Whether you’re NB or totes old school, this is a skill you can’t be without.  And truthfully, whether butch or femme, the right piece of neckwear can be just the thing to attract the attention of all the young witches & wenches…

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This is a joke. Please never dress like this. Unless the invitation says "Hogwarts HO-down," this outfit is always unacceptable.

The following is a brief tutorial on different knots and what they may or may not imply about your personality, sexuality, sexual prowess, and/or general level of competence.

The Half Windsor Knot

 

UNDER achiever.

UNDER achiever.

 

 

 

This knot screams “I overslept!” or “I tied this in the elevator!” or “I don’t want a promotion!”  The single windsor is unavoidably lopsided and always undersized to be the centerpiece of one’s appearance from the chest up.  It never looks neat, and often gives the impression that the wearer took no care in presenting herself this morning–which is clearly not the case.  The NB supports this knot ONLY if the wearer is extremely thin, wearing a skinny tie, and going for a modified Jonas Brothers look with lots of accessories, boots, etc–which can be really sexy.  To be clear, the NB is vehemently against all things Jonas.  But sometimes we like their clothes…and their hair-cuts…and only because they have totally ripped off our look.

The Small Knot

 

 

This knot is up...and tight...

This knot is up...and tight...

 

 

 

Again, if you’re a very thin woman wearing a very thin tie, this one could work.  If you are not, this will make you look like the most anal-retentive, obsessive-compulsive tie-wearing lesbian in all the land.  It may be the perfect look for work if your job involves some sort of micro-analytic skills or is in a very strict setting.  There is something kind of sexy about someone so uptight–but bare in mind, women are going to think you’re into the kinky stuff.  Remember: many times we teach people about ourselves by sending opposite messages in our manner of dress. 

The Four In Hand Knot

 

Goes well with a sharkskin jacket.

Goes well with a sharkskin jacket.

This is a joke.  Seriously, if you’re four years old and this is your fourth attempt to tie a tie, it’s adorable.  Or if you’re going to a retro eighties party as one of the members of A-HA, it’s fine.  Short of that, please, just leave the tie at home.  This is no way to present yourself.  Even when done correctly, this knot looks a mess. At the bar, you’ll look like a poser who has no idea what she’s doing.  You’ll never convince the girl to come sailing with you if this is the first knot she sees.  And that’s why we all head to the bars, right? No? Then why are there so many girls in boat shoes?

 

The Pratt (or Shelby) Knot

Ah the sweet spot!

Ah the sweet spot!

 

 

 

Can’t go wrong with the Shelby.  This knot says, I’m suave, confident, and I understand the power of my actions.  The perfectly centered dimple hints that there’s more than meets the eye.  The soft, medium-sized knot implies a certain amount of modesty.  Yes, this is the knot for the dark-horse, the sleeper.  It’s so perfect it will go unnoticed by most; but for the select few with keen eyes, your taste and execution will be appreciated, lauded even.  Like a warm brandy and a fat cigar–or, if you’re under the age of 50 a fresh berry smoothie and a great article in the Village Voice.  This knot represents all things cool and enjoyable.  The NB highly recommends!

The Double Windsor

 

Perfection!

Perfection!

 

 

 

Symetry? Check.  Proportionality? Check. Confidence? Double Check.  This is the knot of perfection.  The Double Windsor screams competence, confidence, and super-sexidence. This tie says: “Don’t worry, I’ve got everything under control. Sit back, and enjoy the ride.”  This is the knot of the top, the knot of elegance, of genteel manners; in short, it is the official knot of the NB.

We realize there are a number of other knots to be addressed.  We apologize we couldn’t fit them all into one entry.  There’s plenty more blogging to do; we’ll get there, knot to worry.

As Always,

E.I.B.

 

Edu-gaytion Lessons #1: Sappho

In Edugaytion on January 29, 2009 at 4:23 am

Those who are unaware of history are destined to repeat it.

–George Santayana

In other words: You can’t know where you’re going ’till you know where you’ve been.  In this spirit, we’re giving you a little-mini-history lesson.  Don’t worry, nerd-chic is totally “in” this year; so grab your adorkable frames, pull on your cardigan, and buckle up.  Every good NB should have a firm grasp on the lesbian past. After all, we are the future.  

Sappho

 

Sappho , (Le coucher de Sappho), Charles Gleyre, 1867

Sappho , (Le coucher de Sappho), Charles Gleyre, 1867

“There rushes at once through my flesh tingling fire, 
My eyes are deprived of all power of vision, 
My ears hear nothing by sounds of winds roaring, 
And all is blackness.

Down courses in streams the sweat of emotion, 
A dread trembling o’erwhelms me, paler than I 
Than dried grass in autumn, and in my madness 
Dead I seem almost.”

–Sappho

Facts: In its original language (some form of ancient Greek), it’s apparent that these phrases are written about a woman. Sappho was from the isle of Lesbos.  The word “Lesbian” literally meant someone from the island of Lesbos (and still does, albeit awkwardly) and became the term to meaning homosexual woman in the mid 1920’s.  Sappho  lived sometime between the years 630 and 570BCE and apparently had a hot, tortured emotional life that she expressed in the form of her poetry… So, rest easy fellow butches, your feelings are normal and completely unoriginal!

And may we just say: Fat bottom girls, you make the rockin world go round!

 B. Cassidy